Crazy is as Crazy does

At my daughter's recommendation, I've been listening to Holidays on Ice by David Sedaris. The first story is about being a Santa's elf in Macy's when he was in his 30's. Funny, quirky and embarrassing as the people in Macy's are, I'd put my public library patrons up against them any day. The only things is, David didn't know the people he wrote about. I know my patrons and I wouldn't want them reading about how funny, weird and embarrassing I think they are.

I received a phone call from a stranger today and I don't care if he knows how crazy I think he is.

Hello! This is Joe Blow from whatever book company and I want to talk to the librarian.

Speaking.

Oh good, great, wonderful. Did you know that ALA changed the subject heading from Black to African American?

Thinking he might be taking some kind of weird survey I said, "Yes."

You did? Well good for you. Must be because you're a librarian. I thought they were still called blacks but our Encyclopedia of Black Americans has a new name. Now it's called the Encyclopedia of African Americans. I don't know why they want to be called African Americans instead of black. I guess our old set of encyclopedias had them out pickin' cotton and spittin' watermelon seeds. The new one portrays them as scientists and inventors.

Are you trying to sell me something?

Oh, no no no. I just want you to preview our new set for...

I have no budget. Zero money.

OK, thank you.

Click.

Crazy man, wherever you are, I hope you lose my phone number.